My Mopping Life Truth

Have you ever watched the movie “Joy” when Jennifer Lawrence is wringing out a mop that she used to clean up broken glass (because I guess brooms aren’t a thing in Hollywood) and then she cuts her hand to a bloody mess because DUH broken glass. That scene left a MARK on me. It left one on her to because she invents a new mop and makes millions.

How often do you mop your floors?

My answer to this question is similar to when I ask patients how often they floss their teeth. “I mean.. sometimes, every other week.. rarely… never.”

For the better part of my up-bringing, I lived in a very much carpeted home, with linoleum floors in the appropriate areas- kitchen and bathroom. Mopping wasn’t really a “chore” we did, that I remember. There was dusting, vacuuming, windex… and though I’m sure my mom mopped (and also because I’m sure she’s reading this) … I just don’t have a grasp on WHAT IS NORMAL MOPPING.

1) I own an actual mop.

I let the previous owner of our house borrow it before we moved in because hers accidentally got shipped on by the movers.

I said, “sure, it’s like brand new- I’ve hardly ever used it!” (Oh-how-funny-laughter)

Home-owner: “yeah, I can’t believe they packed mine- I use it like everyday”

Silence.

Everyday?

PS: She was a housewife.

BUT STILL. Is that the status quo for hard wood floors? I can’t keep up. I wasn’t trained for this.

2) Let me introduce you to my everyday mop:

She answers to Maggie more than mop, but comes when called and leaves a floor spotless.

Cleaning solution is questionable.

3) I own a Swiffer that I use on occasion simply because I love the smell of the solution in the wipes.

I INVENTED a new technique when using it around my tiny bathroom. I shed more than the dog pictured above and noticed a nice bit of hair and dust in my midst- naturally I thought YEAH I CAN SWIFFER THAT.

Through what started as a very frustrating- yet delightful smelling- experience, I learned if you twirl the Swiffer around the hair like a fork in Spaghetti.. it will kind of clean your floor and get the hair to stick. Trademark pending.

It was during this methodical scientific testing that I thought- maybe I should use an actual mop. Oh and vacuum. And dust.

Maybe I should be a cleaner person. Or MAYBE my husband should be a cleaner person.

#WIFELIFE

Please take pity on me and comment with your cleaning tips.